Here’s Your April Fool’s Day Videogame News Round-Up

By   /   Apr 1, 2012

Yeah, April 1 is one of the most annoying days to be reporting about games – you know why? Because of April Fool’s…and it’s quite easy to misinterpret something as actual “news” when it’s in fact, just a prank released by publishers or developers as an April Fool’s “treat.”

Well, lucky for you there’s us who’s going to save you most of the trouble in distinguishing what’s real and what’s not – though keep in mind that this list isn’t complete.

1# 8-bit Google Maps
This is what you see in the top image. Open Google Maps and on the left column, start the quest to initiate your 8-Bit journey.

2# THQ introduces Saints Row: The Third Enter the Dominatrix DLC
Yep, a DLC that parodies The Matrix movie franchise. The game’s site reveals the April Fool’s DLC details.

  • The Dominatrix Has You: And it feels so good. Bend the Dominatrix to your will and harness an arsenal of super powers including Mind-Bending Telekinesis, Really Really High Jump, Really Really Fast Sprint, Shiny Blue Force Shield, and Shiny Blue Fireball Projectile-of-Doom.
  • – Wondrous Alien Technology: Use Dominatrix weapons as your own, such as the Floppy Alien Tentacle Bat, the Fire-In-The-Sky Alien Abduction Ray, and the ***-stretching Alien Anal Probe, as well as a touch-screen telephonic device with email and map functionality. Reach out and f$%# someone.
  • – Go Three Levels Deep: Enter the Dominatrix within the Dominatrix within the Dominatrix to recruit former Saints from the depths of your own memory to fight Zinyak. It’s all science, with just a little fiction.
  • Will you defeat Zinyak and his invasion armada? Will you escape from virtual reality to rule Steelport once more? Will any of this make any sense? The answers you seek can only be found inside the Dominatrix. So enter it.

3# Valve reveals Ricochet 2 (Steam site)

4# Square Enix announces Chocolate Dimension in Quantum Conundrum and the “official” press release can be read below.

Square Enix Inc. the publisher of SquarE Enix interactive entertainment products in the Americas, and developer Airtight Games today revealed that they’ve been able to fold another dimension into the first person environmental puzzle game Quantum Conundrum. This time, however, instead of harnessing the laws of physics, the new dimension will manipulate the fundamental laws of chemistry.

In chocolate dimension, players will have new options available as they work their way through Quadwrangle Manor:

  • Devour your way through obstacles!
  • Melt-down and re-solidify objects!
  • Stick to the floor, the walls, & the ceiling!
  • Discover all-new (chocolate) Easter eggs!

People are probably wondering, ‘Chocolate dimension? What’s that all about?’,” said Kim Swift, creative director at Airtight Games. “Chocolate is fun! Chocolate has all sorts of amazing properties! Who doesn’t love chocolate?  And besides that, it looks a lot more appetizing than hummus dimension.

Players will get their first taste of chocolate dimension when the game launches later this summer.

5# SEGA unveils Virtual Vineyward

The official statement from SEGA reads:

“People all around the world have been enjoying a glass of wine since the ancient times, and it’s played crucial roles in many ceremonial and social occasions since then. Some people make their own wine at home, but it’s an expensive and laborious process, and therefore not available to the average person.

Even fewer people are able to experience the joy of growing their own grapes due to cost, lack of land, or not living in a grapevine-friendly growing environment. That’s not the way it was ferment to be! You may have already heard this through the grapevine, but to fill this void, we’re proud to announce an addition to our “Virtua” series with Virtua Vineyard.

6# SEGA also shows off Bass Fishing of the Dead

7# Assassin’s Creed Kinect
In what’s the best one I’ve seen yet the whole day, it’s a video for Assassin’s Creed Kinect

8# Prototype 2 – Who is P.A.M?
An intro video to the most bad-ass hero, you have never seen before!

To read up on everything that’s been unearthed so far for this crazy day, click here.

Source: Game Informer

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